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Back to My Horde Roots…and Having Fabulous Hair Again

Back to My Horde Roots…and Having Fabulous Hair Again

Once upon a time, I tweeted: “Had a weird dream that I server-transferred my DK again. Enough! No more throwing cash at #Blizzard. They already have more money than God.”

Well, folks, I just handed them more money and made them richer than God and Satan combined.

Patty-Death Knight


Why? Below are the reasons in random order.

– My husband is a die-hard Horde. Since I switched to Alliance, he and I have never ran anything together in the game. We were always saying how much we missed our bonding moments in Azeroth – questing and farming and skinny-dipping in Nagrand – plus his chaos bolts really hurt. Ya know the old saying, if you can’t beat ’em, join ’em.

– I am a Horde at heart. I started out as Horde and plan on exiting this game as a Horde. I never felt any faction pride as an Alliance. Not once did I cry, “FOR THE ALLIANCE!”  in battlegrounds. Come to think of it, I did only a couple of BGs during my stint as a Human. I just couldn’t bring myself to kill Horde. I. just. couldn’t.

– I needed a change. I wasn’t happy anymore as I was being held back again, progression-wise. I was getting angrier and angrier and losing more and more patience. I was afraid that if I didn’t leave, I would spew very hurtful words that could kill a lot of friendships, and I didn’t want to take that risk. I was in danger of mentally and emotionally snapping in the manner of Walter White:

Walter-Before and After

– I missed having fabulous hair.

– I missed the thug life in Orgrimmar.

– I missed being a member of the one true cool faction. (Cute as they are, gnomes will never be cool.)

– Vol’jin was calling my name. I couldn’t say no. And you know how I love the guy.  #sicklove

– And did I say I missed playing with my husband?

Moving to a new realm where I don’t know anyone besides my other half is always a terrifying experience for me. You know that feeling you get on the first day of school as the new kid who doesn’t know where to sit in the cafeteria? That’s exactly how I felt. I checked Trade for guild recruitment, I checked out other players and their gear. I felt so naked…until I chanced upon a small guild that was willing to let me try out for a spot. I’m on wait-and-see status as of this writing.

So what did I name my Death Knight this time?

I named her Patty after Homer Simpson’s cranky spinster sister-in-law Patty Bouvier…

Patty Bouvier

(Credits: Matt Groening and Fox Broadcasting Company)

…because that’s who I was turning into raid night after raid night. I was becoming mean, impatient and cantankerous. All I needed was a smoking habit and a job at the DMV and I was all set into becoming a human version of her.

You could also say I was in danger of pulling a Patty Hearst if I had stayed.

Patty Hearst

Well, good luck to me in my home. This is it, folks. This is my last and final move, I swear on a stack of Bibles.

Colbert-Stack of Bibles

Wishful Thinking: Free Transfers for the Outnumbered and Oppressed

Wishful Thinking: Free Transfers for the Outnumbered and Oppressed

It’s been almost two months since my Whisperwind raid team moved to Stormrage and I can honestly say that I have no regrets (so far). From getting stuck at 3/12 in Throne of Thunder, we are now at 9/12. We had a rough start during the first few weeks, but now that everybody’s schedule is in sync and our ilevels have improved, getting the job done has become so much easier.

Stormrage is a pretty active, highly-populated and extremely crazy server. Yes, it has its fair share of elitist jerks and trolls and attention whores — Throne of Thunder General Chat is worse than Trade and twice as vile and distracting…

Crude ToT-1

Crude ToT-2

Crude Tot-3

…but I can deal with all that. (Praise Baby Jesus for the Ignore Button) The only thing I really can’t stand is the horrible, horrible queue time.

Stormrage Queue

The only way one can avoid being stuck in queue is to log in way before the witching hour of 7:30 PM Eastern. On raid nights, I play it safe by logging on my toon as early as 5:00 and ensure I don’t stay AFK long enough for me to get booted. God, I miss the days when I could log in 15 minutes before the raid, but if this is the price I have to pay for progression, then so be it.

But on to the meat of this post. The other disconcerting thing I discovered about Stormrage was the near-absence of Horde players. I’d do my farming in Valley of the Four Winds and it would be all Alliance where the cooking trainers and quest givers are. It was like that for several weeks until I bumped into a lone Horde while killing goats for Fatty Goatsteak. I was so shocked to see the female Tauren druid and even more so when she hugged me. He/she looked so lonely and out of place there that it nearly killed me — a Horde at heart.

And I just had to talk to him/her.

So I quickly rolled an orc and struck a conversation with that player.

(By the way, I’m concealing the second half of the toon name lest he/she accidentally stumbles upon this blog post and becomes unhappy about being featured here.)






Once a Horde, always a Horde. That’s what I am. Who do you think caused the Alliance on Whisperwind to fail in their For the Alliance raid in Orgrimmar?  #BenedictArnold

Yes I confess! But moving on…

Dear Blizzard, I know you are in the business of making money and can’t (or is it won’t) always offer free or discounted transfers. But there are many, many players out there like Nomi who are stuck in dying and/or grossly imbalanced servers. They are loyal players, Blizz. They want to continue playing but are disheartened by the circumstances they find themselves in. It’s hard to keep your enthusiasm for this game when your friends have quit or moved servers or faction changed, and you’re the only one left because of financial constraints.

I know virtual realms are in the works, and as far as I know, they involve fusing select realms to function as one. Sounds like a great idea to give life back to low to medium population realms. But what about the likes of Stormrage, Illidan and Mal’Ganis? How do you plan on helping the outnumbered and oppressed on such servers? While you’re still trying to figure that one out, how about offering free transfers again to those high-pop servers, only this time they get to choose from a list of potential new homes instead of having to settle for the one destination you’ve pre-selected for them.

Please don’t ignore the likes of Nomi, Blizz. Give your players more options and we’ll gladly keep paying for our subs.

P.S. Speaking of options, when will you actually make it possible for us to mail heirlooms cross-server?

P.P.S. I believe I am the one billionth customer to ask you that heirloom question. Do I get a prize like a car? If yes, I want a pair of fuzzy dice to go with it.

A One-Way Ticket to New Opportunities

A One-Way Ticket to New Opportunities

I’ve made my decision: I’ll be moving to another realm — my hunter’s server, to be exact. I was promised by my significant other that he’ll take care of it soon; I just don’t know exactly when. All I know is that Blizzard/Activision is going to be $55 richer ($25 for the realm transfer, $30 for the faction change).

Yes, I’m going Alliance. And it’s breaking my heart. I’ve been mainly Horde since Day One of playing World of Warcraft, and I love my Blood Elf Death Knight so much, but recent frustrations have constrained me to take this option.

Patch 5.2: The Thunder King is likely to go live in as little as two weeks. While I normally welcome news of a new patch, new raids, new this and that, the (un)official announcement of 5.2 leaves me feeling a bit crestfallen. There are 16 bosses in this tier, and I have downed only five with my raid group, and here come more bosses for me to worry about. Yeah, a sorry five bosses on normal. And how long has this current patch been out?

I’m not a hard core raider, but I love to raid AND  I like downing bosses with efficient people who share my raiding ethic. But after MoP went live, I saw my original raid group — the ones with whom I downed Heroic: Madness of Deathwing at the tail end of Cataclysm– fall apart and since then I would find myself in a raid group comprised of people who were either very talented or very inept. And if there’s one factor that can kill my enthusiasm for raiding, it’s inconsistency.

Someone asked me, “why invest in another realm/faction transfer? Why don’t you just join another Horde guild on your current server?”

I did consider that option, but you see, I am tired. I am tired of moving to another guild where I would be navigating uncharted waters, only to find myself in another dead-end situation or worse, stuck with a bunch of assholes. This time, I want to play it safe and go for the tried-and-tested. My Alliance hunter is in a very well-established, very highly-regarded raiding guild in her realm (an Alliance-dominated one), her GM runs his guild like a pro without being an elitist jerk, they have a good number of raid teams and they get things done (like, ya know, they’ve downed 16/16 and are now working on heroics). That said, I have to shake my head at the irony I’ve been in the last year or so — my neglected alt ensconced in one of the top guilds in one of the top 40 US servers, and there was my beloved main bouncing from one dying guild/realm to another and being held back by the inconsistencies of others. But that’s MY fault — I chose to stick it out and give it one more shot….and another…and another, until my S.O. himself flipped a wig and asked me when the hell I would wake up and smell the poo-stained one-ply toilet paper, short of asking me, “doesn’t your ass hurt from all that wiping?”

And yes, yes it does, hun. Why do you think I’m switching “brands”?

Wish me luck on this move, as this is going to be the last major one I’ll be making. It’s make-or-break for my progression, my sanity and my wallet.

Grand Armored Wyvern

Grand Armored Wyvern

Nothing screams Horde pride more than the Grand Armored Wyvern, which I got today after hitting exalted with Dominance Offensive.

(Click to see actual size)

I have a mind to make this my main flying mount from now on.


Intermission: My Horde Hoodie

Intermission: My Horde Hoodie

ZOMG finally got my Horde hoodie after nearly a month of waiting!

Horde Hoodie

Thanks to my former co-worker Marvin who introduced me to the dude who custom designs WoW-inspired apparel.

Here’s the detail of the front:

Horde Design

For the Horde!!!