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Decisions, Decisions

Decisions, Decisions

When your raiding team moves to another server and your Raid Leader offers to pay for your server transfer so you could resume progression with them, what would you do?

Hiker

(Image from: Cybex Fitness Blog)

Eh, I’ve made my decision.

To be continued.

Guildies That Give Me Pause

Guildies That Give Me Pause

My behavior in World of Warcraft is a reflection of how I am in real life. I am not one of those Jekyll and Hyde people who lose their manners and consideration for others and raise hell in the game. I bring my real life work ethic even into the virtual world by being self-sufficient; you will never see me ask or beg for anything for free, let alone steal. And paying the same 15 dollars like everyone else does is not something I assume automatically entitles me to everything, including a raid spot. In some cases, I will have to pay my dues (ESPECIALLY when it comes to raid spots). It may be just a game but I know that real life manners and principles must be brought to Azeroth to ensure a harmonious existence. Simply put, I know that I have to be nice and I expect my guildies to accord me and everyone else in the guild a modicum of respect.

I’ve joined a good number of guilds since I started playing this game. I’ve encountered many different guild personalities – the joker, the sensitive soul, the sweet type, the brash mofo, the horny toad…stereotypes that may very well exist in every guild. I am normally welcoming to all new faces that join but there are certain people who give me pause. They’re not necessarily the people who do extreme things like steal or cuss or troll on Trade. On the contrary, they’re not…what’s the word…blatant. They actually APPEAR well behaved, but that’s what makes them devious. They appear okay then the next thing you know they’re poisoning the guild or stabbing you in the back or both.

Stab in the Back

In my older posts, I talked about my horrid experience with my last guild which was a disaster in every sense of the word. My last week there was spent pulling out one knife after another from my back. And those knives were the handiwork of guildies who turned out to be wolves in sheep’s clothing. If I were to use the daytime soap stereotype on them, they’d be the best friend who slept with your significant other or the business partner who, one day, decided to be bad and dramatically oust you from the boardroom.

Just how do you spot a wolf-in-sheep’s-clothing-type guildie? There’s no foolproof method I can recommend; I just go with my gut instinct and my gut is usually right. Here are examples of behavioral patterns and traits that make me wary:

1. When a guildie asks for guild bank access and he’s been in the guild for only a few days.

2. When a female guildie leads a high-ranking guildie on, seduces him into giving her a raid spot, an expensive item (*cough Vial of the Sands *cough), and every freebie under the sun…then dumps him once she’s gotten what she could squeeze out of him AND proceeds to sniff out another male guildie she can victimize into becoming her Sugar Daddy. Chicks like that give the rest of the female population in WoW a bad name. I could dedicate an entire post about this personality that capitalizes on her feminine wiles.

3. When a guildie who isn’t even part of the core group throws a hissy-fit behind our backs and has the nerve to chastise the GM for not being on top of the situation. Seriously, you just joined the guild and you think we owe you a raid spot? Ever heard of paying your dues first? Probably not. Go f*ck yourself.

4. When a guildie hits level 85 and asks for free BoE gear. So you actually expect us to give you valor boots and bracers and crafted items right off the bat and we don’t even know you that well? Who’s to say you won’t g-quit after you’ve gotten the goodies? I’d feel more confident and fulfilled wiring money to some random Nigerian dude; at least I’ll get a 55% share of the $22 million some deposed despot left unclaimed in a bank.

5. When a guildie tries too hard to ingratiate himself with everybody. I just can’t quite put a finger on this one; this is where gut instinct comes into play. He or she looks nice, acts nice, talks nice but there is something “off” about that person. My gut instinct proved me right when one ex-guildie – deemed as one of the most pleasant members around – organized an impromptu continuation of Throne of the Four Winds, leaving out half of the people in the original group. What added to the cringe factor was that this guy claimed he hero-worshipped me, thought I was such an awesome Death Knight and that he modeled his own DK after me, bla bla bla. Yeah, sure, Brutus, go ahead and butter me up some more. Don’t forget to replace the butter knife with a steak knife before you butter my back. Or would you rather use a cleaver?

6. When a new guildie invites his own friends over to the guild and they turn out to be colossal self-entitled brats. You know what they say about the company you keep…

7. When a guildie keeps charging his repairs to the guild vault, yes, even that measly 2 silver repair bill.

8. When a guildie tries to look important by announcing on Vent that he would like to have a word with the GM in private in another channel (and does this a LOT). Gee, why not just whisper him instead? Like we would be soooo intrigued and interested to know what you two could be discussing.  /eyeroll

9. When a new guildie asks what he or she can do to get promoted to officer or raid leader soon. Nice to know you’re the ambitious type.

10. When a guildie I barely know asks a  lot of personal questions. My paranoid side suspects that person is gathering info he can use against me someday. Some of the most invasive questions were about my family, finances, and fetishes. Do you seriously need to know that I have a fetish for donkey shows? Oops. TMI.  /end sarcasm

I know it may seem that I have trust issues in this game but after everything I’ve experienced, I think I have every right to be wary and guarded.

Author Stephen M.R. Covey said in an interview that trusting the people around us is a balancing act. The more we lead out with trust, extend trust and start with trust, the greater the outcomes. We can’t operate an organization if there is always a high level of distrust.

“Don’t go the other extreme,” he says. “Just because you can’t trust someone, you can’t trust anyone. Don’t let the fact that you couldn’t trust someone before affect you now and your ability to trust anyone. Yes, too much trust will get you burned, but not enough trust and you lose possibilities and foreclose on options.”

Obviously, Stephen M. R. Covey has never played World of Warcraft.

Dear Crazy Li’l Ducelet

Dear Crazy Li’l Ducelet

Dear Crazy Li’l Ducelet,

For quite some time now, I’ve been wondering when your craziest, most insane self would manifest, and today was the day.

See, I knew there was something quite not right about you. I spotted that when the guild was young but I let it slide because we humans have our mood swings. I myself have my own imperfections, Lord knows, but I try to rise above them to the best of my ability.

You invited me to your guild with the saccharine-sounding name Ever After when it was only a couple of days old. I recall you whispered my guildless alt Ysabel, very politely asking me if I was looking for a guild and if I would care to join your level 1 guild with its 30 plus members or so. Because you struck me as someone normal and polite, I accepted your invitation. Pretty soon, the rest of my toons joined Ever After, including of course my beloved Death Knight.

Time passed. More people joined the guild and we started doing things together. Everyone was friendly and reachable. It was a peaceful, happy time.

On hindsight, it was the calm before the storm but I am getting ahead of myself here.

Then we started doing raids. Old school ones, that is. It was from those raids that you determined who were the most skilled and the most dependable — potential members of your Dream Team. And I happened to be one of them.

And it was while we were doing those old school raids that I first got a peek at your selfish nature. You brazenly declared  “first dibs” on everything that was of value — items for your Thunderfury quest, that stupid ribbon that drops from Precious in ICC…hell, you even called first dibs on Ashes of Al’ar should it ever dropped. I mean really? You gather a guild that you can use for items you can’t obtain by yourself?  Was that our original purpose? If yes, then you know what that makes you? A user.

Then we started doing the Cataclysm raids. We wiped repeatedly, but that’s all part of the learning process. It was still a happy time because we all got along and supported one another. You made sure to kick anyone who displayed the slightest hint of a bad attitude, and that was one of your best qualities as a leader. You wouldn’t take shit from bratty, immature members. And true enough, Ever After was brat-free.

But not for long.

The guild grew at an alarming rate. I say alarming because we took on too many people who felt entitled to raid even if they were as skilled and geared as a pile of donkey dung. People bitched. The bitching probably became too much for you to handle because eventually you announced the formation of Raid Group 2.

Then as we continued to grow and hit Level 25, that’s when things turned from shot to shit. The quality of our roster went from Social Registry to Jersey Shore Black Book. You had all these people who came out of nowhere asking what they needed to do to get promoted. Selfish, devious hypocrites a number of them are. And may I add, confused too because they saw you change the guild ranks more times than Lindsay Lohan got arrested for DUI. Even I got so confused as you would tell me one thing then totally counter yourself the next day. One word came to mind and since then I couldn’t shake it off:  SYBIL.

Oh, don’t get me wrong. I have nothing against people with personality disorders. I knew you were on meds and that’s okay. Do what you have to do to get a grip on yourself. But I wonder, especially during the last three weeks, if you’ve run out of supply or simply need to cut the dose, because truth is, honey, you started losing it. I saw how spineless you have become to the new faces that invaded our guild. I saw how you caved in to their wails of protest when I proposed to demote that devious little weasel Vokron. I saw how you couldn’t handle the mob. You’re the GM and you got scared of those self-entitled interlopers. For all your tough talk, you turned out to be a spineless scaredy little cat.

What happened to you, hun? I remember you kicking out folks who displayed the slightest bit of impertinence. But when I recently called out certain people for their rudeness, what did you do? You listened to them when they complained about me. You disregarded me, your officer and staunchest supporter, and while I was offline, you kicked my alts and demoted my DK like the fucked-up coward that you are.

What’s wrong, hun? Can’t handle me because I call a spade a fucking spade? Because I don’t hide behind some lame “I just want us to get along” stand? Because I refuse to let you sweep things under the rug? Hey, off-topic here, what did you do to the 50,000 gold you withdrew from the guild vault? Is it to buy yourself another Vial of Sands?

Someone told me that when I pulled my DK out of the guild, Sheister said on guild chat “She’ll be back.”  Well, you know what? I will never come back. And even if you kicked out the people who caused all the drama in the first place, I will never set foot in your guild again. I am done dealing with your volatile nature. I am done seeing your pathetic lackeys hide and whimper and suck up to you because they’re afraid of losing the guild perks. Sad to see people whoring their principles for a few guild perks.

I had my fun times with you and the Ever After peeps, but it’s time to step away from your psychotic tendencies. No need for me to plot your demise like some cheap Pulp Fiction character. You can very well manage that yourself. Oh, and karma’s a bitch by the way. Watch out.

Yours truly,

Cloudrunner

P.S. You really should see the Singing Ferret video! It describes you to a T.

P.P.S. Have the lambs stopped screaming?

Me, the Other Dude and Himself

Me, the Other Dude and Himself

Disclaimer: I have nothing against bipolar people. I acknowledge that their condition needs medical attention as well as the love and patience of family and friends. Bipolar disorder is no laughing matter. But it sure as hell is frustrating to those who are on the receiving end of volatile mood swings. This post is an outlet for my frustrations dealing with difficult people in WoW. I have been recently experiencing too much drama in the game, caused by the alarming whims of certain individuals. Frankly, I don’t know know if those said individuals are actually bipolar or  just scatter-brained attention whores (like the dude in my previous post). All I know is that I am pissed at them. It’s a long story. Fuck, I am rambling, but I’m just too mentally and emotionally exhausted to write coherently.

Raid progression has been slow lately because raids keep getting fucking canceled. Canceled by who? I’m not mentioning names in this post. Try waking up early in my time zone so you can meet the agreed time for the raid only to find out that the person canceled it because she was tired and wanted to rest…but you see she stays online to level an alt from 73 to 85 in one sitting. I had only three words for her. What. The. Fuck.

Then last week, we had an emotionally charged meeting where I ended up looking like the Guild Nazi because suddenly the person who was supposed to back me up lost her spine and spleen along the way, and I was left to my own devices. Nothing got resolved. The other camp got their way. What. The. Fuck.

Try dealing with such a person who is sweet and funny one minute, then cancels all raids then rearranges officer and member permissions the next while even demoting some on the spot, and declares, “this is all pissing me off!”

Erm, okay.

Just to give you an idea of what kind of personality I’m talking about, check out this video:

The past several days have been akin to walking through a landmine. You don’t know what new shit is gonna get pulled out of the hat. I am hating some of the new people in the guild. We were supposed to halt guild recruitment but, um, let’s just say the Ferret struck again and hasn’t been exactly recruiting the best people on Exodar. What used to be a very happy, intimate family-type guild has been invaded by the bratty bastard relations of the cast of Jersey Shore.

I know I must not be making any sense but I don’t fucking care I’m sleepy and tired and fed up with dealing with the Ferrets in this game. Good night.

Guild Drama: Watch Your Mouth, Kid

Guild Drama: Watch Your Mouth, Kid

There is a holy paladin in my guild who is probably the best pally healer we have. He is so good that he is a fixture in our core raiding group, and our GM loves his heals in PvP. I’m not going to mention his name out of respect for my GM and the guild, so I’ll just call him by the very macho name Princess.

On vent, Princess sounds like something Central Casting would recommend to the late John Hughes to fill a minor but irritatingly unforgettable role in one of his signature teen angst films. If you’ve seen any of his flicks, you’ll notice one of their common denominators is the stereotypical smart alecky, opinionated kid (though what modern teen film doesn’t have that stereotype? It’s almost a requirement like the token Black best friend). Now I respect even the most ridiculous opinions — you’re free to express yourself, just please refrain the f*ck from indoctrinating me or worse, insulting me. But I’m getting ahead of myself here.

Playing WoW is like watching one of those teen-centric films; there’s always at least one character that’s bound to really get on your nerves. I found that character on Exodar, and unfortunately – you guessed it – it’s Princess, and he happens to be my guildie and fellow raider, so unless I want to die from lack of heals, I can’t really put him on ignore.

Not putting him on ignore means I have to hear his running commentary on everything and everything. Not only is the tone of his voice irritating and condescending, but the pitch is far from baritone that you wonder if he’s dealing with delayed puberty. The guy just won’t shut up because he needs to let everyone know how smart and funny he is, when in fact he comes across as terribly insulting.  Example: our guildie priest died in a Firelands trash run because he didn’t know the spinning turtles were actually dangerous (I actually thought they were so cute till they did a number on my ass). Before rezzing the priest, Princess declared on vent, “__________, I can’t heal stupid, you know.”

No one is sacred to Princess. He will insult anyone.

Unfortunately for him, he recently picked me, which is akin to planning your own funeral in these parts. Here’s what happened:

We were all on Vent that day. Then WoW started acting weird, kicking me repeatedly. I said, “WoW is going dumb on me!”

Princess, without missing a beat, said, “Or maybe YOU are going dumb on WoW!”

Gasps on vent.

“F*ck you, Princess!” I snarled. That’s it. The guy just signed his death warrant. Just you wait, I said to myself.

So last night server time, we did our Baradin Hold run. All raiders were on Vent, of course. Princess kept yakking and yakking as usual about everything under the sun. I wanted to hurl him straight into Occu’thar’s jaws.

Then, just before the boss pull, I cracked, “Hey, ______, I once had a voice like yours, and then I turned 4.”

LOL’s and snickers ensued.

“Shut up, woman!” was the wittiest reply he could muster.

“Shut up, virgin!” I shot back. A peal of laughter exploded somewhere.

Well, that shut him up.

See, I can’t understand why some people feel the need to be condescending to others, even to their own guildies. That’s just so wrong. We are in the same guild, let’s exercise a modicum of respect for one another. We don’t have to like each other. Just please be considerate to the other person. That includes watching what you say and how you say it. You might think you’re funny, but not everyone shares the same biting humor you proudly possess. Sarcasm, putdowns and dismissive remarks have no place in a happy guild. Please take your drama where they will really be appreciated. Hey, you just might win an Oscar!

And then I just might be impresssed!

In the meantime, learn to eat humble pie. It’ll do your soul – and your dying popularity – wonders.

What a Sad, Sad Person

What a Sad, Sad Person

This is the kind of person that will never be welcome in any guild.

Now I usually try to be the better person in the equation but in this case, turning the other cheek won’t do. I’m gonna go for Hammurabi’s Code — an eye for an eye.

Zestrenny - Alt

Reply to Zestrenny-1

Reply to Zestrenny-2

Dear Zestrenny and your lame alts,

It is people like you who make WoW the cesspool that it is and destroy the camaraderie and peace that guilds like Ever After wish to foster. You are pathetic in the sense that you are heavily in denial that YOU are the one with the attitude problem. Who started saying bad words on guild chat the night of the OS run? YOU did. You started that little drama and you wanted me to indulge you by publicly chastising Sheister. Well, you know what? Good officers don’t chastise people on guild chat. They do it privately, if only out of respect for the guildie’s dignity. God forbid you ever form your own guild or become officer in another one; you will surely earn more enemies than Osama Bin Laden and people will want you hanged, drawn and quartered.

I sure would like to do that to you now.

I’m glad you’re out of Ever After. You were no real asset to begin with anyway. Good luck in your search for another guild. You’ll need it.

Better yet, delete every single one of your toons. Azeroth would be a much better place without you.

Love,

Cloudrunner

P.S. I could supply you with a dynamite for your rectum if you wish.

Zestrenny Gets Her Panties in a Twist

Zestrenny Gets Her Panties in a Twist

LMAO! I love people who whisper me hateful messages only to log out immediately before I could reply. Classic!

Take a look at my (thankfully) former guildie Zestrenny  who sent me a quick whisper lashing out at me for something that happened OVER A MONTH AGO in Obsidium Sanctum, where we did a not so successful drake run because Sheister’s tank accidentally pulled one mob and a few people DPS’d the mini-drake boss down, which negated the mount drop. Zestrenny, who was on her level 85, started calling Sheister a “fucking moron” on guild chat, which resulted in a word war.

Zestrenny-Whisper

Anyway, Zestrenny wanted me to punish Sheister on public. I told him/her, look I don’t reprimand people in public. I told Zes what he or she did was on guild chat was uncalled for. Apparently, my diplomatic methods of solving the quarrel weren’t enough for the irascible selfish runt. He/she seethed for another month or so before leaving the guild, then proceeded to send me that lovely whisper.

Now the mature thing to do is to pay Zestrenny no mind and let him/her stew in his/her own juices, but I couldn’t resist sending a love letter to acknowledge that final salvo.

Mail to Zestrenny

Yeah, moral of the story: DON’T. FUCK. WITH. ME.

Jumping Ship…Again

Jumping Ship…Again

Ya know, I’m not the type to change guilds like they were going out of style.

But like finding a life partner, you have to go through several assholes till you stumble upon a gem.

Sometimes you think you may have found THE ONE, but there’s just that nagging little voice inside you that keeps telling you, nope, this ain’t the one.

Especially when you log in and you still get that off-vibe from the people, if you know what I mean.

What exactly do I want in a guild?

I want a guild that…

…is friendly and supportive

…doesn’t tolerate Trade chat trolling

…acknowledges the accomplishments – big or small – of every guildie

…gives everyone a fair chance to raid

…actually does raid, and it doesn’t have to be everyday, as long there is something to do every week

…doesn’t exhibit blatant favoritism

…doesn’t put pressure on members to perform or threaten to boot them out if they don’t meet the numbers

Unfortunately, I don’t think the last so-called semi-hardcore raiding guild I joined is not a good match. I need to be in a guild where my Item Level does not encapsulate my worth as a member.  I have out-DPS’d people who have better gear, but unfortunately this expansion has made almost every Raid Leader obsessed over iLevels (it’s the new Gear Score, folks. Different name, same shit!), they refuse to see past that ironclad requirement that they won’t let a couple of missing iLevel points slide.

Unless you’re their close buddy, which I wasn’t. New hunter made it to the Blackwing Descent core raid group even if, like me, he was 2 points shy from the 345 iLevel requirement imposed by the GM.

Yeah, favoritism is a great motivator and an incentive to stay.

Not.

I am now in a young guild where the GM is refreshingly free of pretense and e-peening in spite of her accomplishments.  My alts were the first ones to join this guild, and I found the atmosphere relaxed and welcoming. It only made sense to bring in over the rest of my toons…and drag my buddy Hordor along. Lord knows we’ve been searching for a good guild since we arrived on this server.

I hope and pray this guild IS the one.

The Guild Trip: Zerging Down Memory Lane – Part 7 (Finale)

The Guild Trip: Zerging Down Memory Lane – Part 7 (Finale)

Part 6 is here, folks.

Now where was I?

Oh my gawd…

Sixth Guild: OBAMUNISM

Description:  White trash fascism. ‘Nuff said!

I can only invoke an unholy power when I hear or see this guild’s name. Their GM and officers have no concept of noblesse oblige. Want proof? Check out this post. Don’t ever join raids hosted by Obamunism, because no matter how decent a damage dealer you are, if you win loot, certain members – particularly the likes of Mattbobbob, ßellaatheña, and Shamitaur – will  make fun of you on Guild chat and say you don’t deserve to win anything because your DPS didn’t even land you in the top 5. Or even if you are top DPS and you win a roll, they’ll still say you didn’t deserve it because you’re not in their guild. So basically, all PUGgies are destined to get screwed. You can’t roll on Marks or primordial saronite bars. If you’re on the quest The Sacred and the Corrupt and you join their ICC 25-man, there’s no way in heaven or hell they’ll let you roll on the acidic blood dropped by Festergut and Rotface. Guildies get first dibs (again).

Small wonder I left them for my current guild.

In my entire year and a half of playing WoW, my stint with Obamunism was the shortest and also the nastiest. I have never seen so many arrogant, hateful and selfish people lumped together in one guild that isn’t even in the same caliber as Risen from the Ashes, and yet they exude the same level of smugness that’s normally entitled to guilds that could easily down the Lich King on Heroic mode like it was just another day in Naxxramas (Blood Legion, anyone?).

I have nothing positive to say about my three-week stay with them, except perhaps my hunter being lucky enough to win Zod’s Repeating Longbow and Distant Land.  It sorta made up for Cloudrunner’s big loss on the necklace and ring. Sorta.

But I bet all my frost emblems the trio of Matt, ßella and Shami had something nasty to say behind my back when I won both times. And if they did, it would have come as no surprise. Negative, bitter people like them have nothing going for them in real life so they make up for that deficit by ninja’ing, bullying and putting down people in a game that is the lone source of their self-worth. (“Their WoW achievement points must be higher than their annual income,” snickered one real-life friend of mine)

Who wants to stay in a guild where you constantly have to be on your guard, the loot rules make your guild look like fascist douchebags to other people, and you can’t even trust Angryorcface, the GM, to keep his word to his own member? (Hey Angry , you still owe me TWO primordial saronites, you shiftless prick!)

Meh, forget it. I can buy own primordials. This is what you can do for me, Angry old man: disband your guild. That ought to spare the innocent denizens of Borean Tundra the terrible consequences of PUGging with you.

Or you can just STFU on Trade Chat about LFM to fill your 25-man slots and tell the rest of your sorry-assed members to get online so you don’t have to PUG. That ought to give them a chance to win phat lootz.

That is, if ßellaatheña will let them have it.

Ha!

I’m done with this Guild Trip saga.Time to move on to other interesting topics such as…

“Borean Tundra’s Sexiest Voices on Vent”.

Now excuse me, I have a list to write.

The Guild Trip: Zerging Down Memory Lane – Part 6

The Guild Trip: Zerging Down Memory Lane – Part 6

Part 5 is here, folks.

So Denefblah, our two friends Genie and Adam, and I found a new home in Carpe Noctem. Clyde didn’t stay too long. His emotional hissy-fits got him into trouble and our GM Mooko kicked him out. I actually had him removed, especially when I found out he was telling people I was his girlfriend.

So…

Fifth Guild:  CARPE NOCTEM

Description: Like a wonderful love affair turned sour.

My first several weeks in Carpe Noctem were, in a word, superb. We did the weeklies, we went for old-school achieves, we learned so many new fights. My hunter got the Champion of the Frozen Wastes title when we downed Malygos after the fifth attempt.

That’s right. The FIFTH attempt. In a row. That’s how patient our leaders were, particularly the husband-and-wife team of Ragingstorm and Lisawild. The guild’s star main tank and off-tank, respectively, Raging and Lisa were articulate, unflappable and disciplined raid leaders. They explained the fights so clearly and simply we knew our roles right away. And when we wiped, they still cheered us on: “We got this! We got this!” It was a dream to raid with them.

Unfortunately, like any dream, this one was too good to last and my close friends and I woke up to the nightmare of guild drama, only this time it involved a power struggle between the GM and Raging. While I wasn’t privy to their exchanges in their little private channel on Vent, I knew that in a nutshell it was about the GM starting to feel that Raging was trying to take absolute control of the guild, acting like he owned Carpe Noctem, and that he even insisted on using his own Vent account for raid purposes instead of Mooko’s.

Petty shit like that.

Then one day, I saw that Mooko had kicked out the couple from the guild. According to him, he “just had to get rid of the cancer”.

Well, I didn’t know what type of cancer he was referring to but he certainly kicked out two outstanding tanks from our guild who knew their stuff in every instance we ventured into. And their loss, to me, was the real cancer that helped kill the guild.

Things started going downhill. We lost some more people. We started failing miserably in ICC, doing one boss per run. ONE BOSS! And if we were lucky, we were able to move to Lady Deathwhisper before the instances reset. But most times, we found ourselves doing our daily frost runs and nothing else much. I started to feel that my $15 a month wasn’t taking me anywhere…again.

Restless and frustrated, Denefblah and I held private conversations in-game and via Facebook. We were tired of guild-hopping, of the drama we encountered every time we joined a guild that dashed our hopes, and tired of doing mount runs with Mooko.

Yeah, speaking of mount runs, here’s a little story to let you know that in spite of my frustrations, I still try to be a good guild member and follower to my GM…

For the longest time, even way before I joined Carpe Noctem, Mooko had been in and out of Sethekk Halls trying to get the rare mount Reins of the Raven Lord. Only druids can summon the boss that drops this mount, and his being a druid was half the job done.

All he needed was a deferential, helpful plate wearer to accompany him and absorb all the damage on Heroic mode.

Again and again and again till the damn thing dropped.

He found that deferential, helpful plate wearer in one Death Knight named Cloudrunner.

We ran through Sethekk Halls so many times I lost count. I took on the mobs and bosses a la Chuck Norris. My plate armor took a beating. But did I even charge my repair bills to his guild bank? Nope.

Then one day, the mount dropped. Mooko nearly had a seizure. He rolled Need.

I passed.

He asked me why I passed. I told him I didn’t think it was right to roll Need on something he had been trying to get for several months. It was his mount run after all.

He tried to pay me 500 gold. I declined. I told him I don’t charge friends for helping them. Hell, I don’t even charge random players when I enchant stuff for them, why should I start charging my own GM?

He promised to run me through Sethekk Halls week after week till I get the mount. I said I’d like that.

But mount runs alone do NOT make me happy. I wanted to raid. And so did Den, who grew more restless with me as our raids got canceled and we found ourselves having to PUG ICC and sundry raids. Mooko didn’t seem to mind, though…

…until we joined Obamunism’s ICC 25-man run. And Obamunism was Raging and Lisa’s new guild.

And it didn’t help that the couple was still on his shit list, and oh wow, how he still continued to bash them on guild Vent! Mooko expected me and Den to stay away from them, but my firm stand was this: his enemies are NOT my enemies. And my $15 was my damn $15 each month and I was determined to make the most of my WoW subscription! I didn’t want to spend my gaming hours running old-school dungeons hoping some dang mount will drop, I wanted to fight my way through Icecrown Citadel!

Twice Den and I joined Obamunism’s 25-man runs, and twice Mooko got upset. Though he denied being upset, he was obviously pissed with the way he kept making these snide, sarcastic remarks on Guild chat. Those remarks drove me and Denefblah to make that crucial decision to leave Carpe Noctem.

So Mooko lost his top two ranged damage dealers. We took our alts along with us. We left wordlessly. There was no point in arguing with our GM; not even dynamite would move him anyway. He was so convinced that Angryorcface (Obamunism’s GM), Ragingstorm, and Lisawild poached me and Denefblah from Carpe Noctem on purpose to spite him. Well, heck, even if those three people offered me a free trip to Europe I wouldn’t have joined their guild if I was already happy in my current one.

But the thing was, I wasn’t happy anymore in Carpe Noctem! I was tired of being asked to remain loyal even if my loyalty and my helpfulness were not taking me anywhere.

Besides, I still didn’t have my damn Reins of the Raven Lord, because Mooko wasn’t online enough to spend time with me to run through Sethekk Halls. So much for his offer…

Next thing I heard, Mooko packed up and took some key members with him, including my friends Genie and Adam, and transferred to another realm called Sen’jin. Some of their alts are still on Borean Tundra, so Carpe Noctem still exists, but it doesn’t look like anything is happening in that guild.

Denefblah and I had no regrets leaving Carpe Noctem.

Besides, there was a totally new set of regrets we were about to face as we joined Obamunism.

To be continued…

The Guild Trip: Zerging Down Memory Lane – Part 5

The Guild Trip: Zerging Down Memory Lane – Part 5

Part 4 is here, folks.

Clyde mellowed and I became comfortable enough to run randoms with him (and occasionally with Dkkarz) again. Then we had our weeklies, which was either Ulduar or Naxxramas. Our guild regained its light, happy atmosphere, and oh I also made two new close friends – the husband and wife team of Genie and Adam (who are no longer on the server but we still keep in touch and God, how I love those two).

Then Dkkarz met some dude on our server and BAM! she said she was in love. Well, okay, good for ya, hun. As long as he ain’t some Ted Bundy reincarnation, it looks likes you have found the man of your dreams.

I thought that would put an end to her competitiveness and distract her enough to mind her own business, seeing how she had eyes for only one man and was clearly on Cloud Nine with him.

I was wrong.

I’ll get to the “I was wrong” part soon.

Clyde’s jealousy would rear its ugly head once in a while . In one Naxx run, he and our GM were messing around, cracking jokes about women…and Clyde said out of the blue, “Anhur is mine.”

Our GM said, “Nope, she’s mine, I saw her first.”

Not content with saying that, he even announced via raid warning: “ANHUR IS MINE”

It was obviously just a joke but Clyde took it seriously. He whispered, “I’m second best, I know.”

I replied: “What??”

He didn’t say anything back. He fell quiet. HOWEVER, while we were in combat with Sapphiron, he suddenly whispered, “I love you.”

I was like, WTF? and nearly didn’t make it to the back of the ice block.

It became his habit to whisper “I love you” to me even in the most inopportune times. Fighting Grobulus? “I love you.” Fighting Sartharion? “I love you.” Doing our corpse run? “I love you.” Hell yeah!

One day he saw me and Denefblah fishing together by the fountain of Dalaran. He whispered, “Teaching your son how to fish?”

“Don’t be silly,” I said.

“I’m jealous.”

Oh for Pete’s sake, Den is 17 effing years old!!!

If you think his jealousy was hilarious, I don’t. He started acting like he owned me, growing jealous of our GM, believing that he and I had something going on.

Dkkarz – his willing accomplice – made it her business to find out.

And not only did she make it her business to probe if I had something going on with the GM, but she also made it a priority to build up Clyde as well as give me the impression that if I did have a “special relationship” with our GM, he was merely playing me for a fool.

And that’s not all. She and Clyde cooked up stories about Clyde trying to commit suicide because I wasn’t paying him attention. “He overdosed on this. He overdosed on that. He’s now in intensive care.”

Talk about someone who obviously had too much time on her hands..not to mention her fiance’s sex organ not suffice enough to stuff her f*cking mouth shut.

However, the petty jealousies, the intrigues, and the speculations took a back seat when our GM’s personal and professional life started imposing more demands on him, rendering him unavailable to the guild. That meant raids were no longer happening. Guildies who wanted to raid more left. I, along with the other officers, were left to our own devices to run the ship but we still depended on Hirotwo to teach us the fights.

It was the beginning of the end.

To cut to the chase, we left Frozensoulstone one by one. I was one of the last few to leave. I clung on to a smidgen of hope. I loved the guild so much and seeing it sink like the Titanic broke my heart in a thousand pieces.

“You still gonna pay $15 a month just to twiddle your thumbs in Dalaran?” one ex-guildie said.

No, I don’t want to keep waiting and hoping like some dejected lover.

“Then damn it, girl, leave! It’s your $15. You’re an amazing hunter, your DK has promise. Don’t let your DPS skills go to waste. You need to be in a guild where you can f*cking raid!”

I left.

But not before finding a new home for some of my friends. I chanced upon a guild advertisement for Carpe Noctem on Trade chat, a guild I once raided with and found to be very affable and easygoing. Genie and Adam’s toons jumped ship and joined Carpe Noctem. Then Genie send me the invite to join. Soon I got Denefblah into the guild.

Dkkarz joined her fiance’s guild Vanguard. Clyde went guildless for a short while then joined Carpe Noctem.

———————————

Epilogue to Frozensoulstone: Hirotwo, upon finding out he lost most of his officers, disbanded the guild and moved to another server. He and I lost touch during that period he was angry at me, feeling betrayed by my actions. After what seemed like an eternity to me, he messaged me one day asking how I was. Our friendship was rekindled.

Clyde, out of rabid jealousy, got Dkkarz to lie to me that she heard a gunshot while on the phone with him. Just another “failed suicide attempt”, ho hum.

I finally”confronted” her in the game asking her why the f*ck she lied about the gunshot, why she was making her business to find out about me and our former GM, and that even if there was indeed something going on, IT WAS NONE OF HER BLOODY F*CKING BUSINESS WHO I WAS SCREWING ON BOREAN TUNDRA.

She put me on ignore. I put her and all her fail toons on ignore. I “unfriended” her on Facebook.

Dkkarz hun, you and I have been enemies for months. My life in game is perfectly fine without your so-called friendship. You seem happy with your new hubby and your Level 80 resto shaman who can’t heal doodly-squat, and I figured you’ve finally found your own peace. I, on the other hand, continue to mind my own business. If I were really petty and childish, I would /spit on you each time you passed by, if only to show you how disgusted I am still by the behavior you exhibited and the troubles you caused in Frozensoulstone. But I let you be and went my merry way raiding and gearing up.

Until you messaged my guildie last night and told him I was “a bitch, a slut, a whore”.

So now you got me riled up enough to expose your toon names in my Guild Trip saga, I have to thank you for unwittingly giving me carte blanche to tell the whole world what a lying, conniving C. U. Next Tuesday you are, and to remind the rest of the Tundramen to be careful in dealing with you. Lord knows my guildies are terrified when they see in VoA that you’re the raid healer. Visions of astronomical repair bills start dancing in their heads.

You’re so full of yourself, you know that? Reality check, Ms. Attention Whore: you’re fat, your clothes don’t match, and you’re faker than pressed-on nails.

Go f*ck yourself.

Ladies and gentlemen, Cloudrunner has left the building. Thank you and good night.

To be continued…

The Guild Trip: Zerging Down Memory Lane – Part 4

The Guild Trip: Zerging Down Memory Lane – Part 4

Part 3 is here, folks.

I was supposed to publish Part 4 much earlier but something came up which merited a drastic revision of the draft.

See, I found out that Bonnie actually went up to a guildie of mine earlier to tell him that I was – and I quote – “a bitch, a slut, a whore”.

I actually laughed. Laughed my ass off so hard because she unwittingly gave me license to expose her character names, which I will do right now.

Okay, folks, “Bonnie” is actually Dkkarz and Cynsshaman, the former being her fail DK and the latter her equally fail resto shaman on Borean Tundra. She also had that Troll Warrior named Karlia but I don’t see that fail toon anymore in the WoW Armory so I’m guessing she either changed its name or deleted it.

Now back to where I left off in the Frozensoulstone saga…

On hindsight, Dkkarz was someone another friend of mine would classify as a “frenemy” or friendly enemy. She gave the appearance of being a sincere, caring guildie-slash-friend but was actually keeping tabs on and competing with me. One guildie told me that whenever I was not online she would complain in a joking manner that she was the oldest member online, hence the snide remark “Oh I’m not anymore!” everytime I logged into the game. It did puzzle me a bit but I was never one to probe the first line I see in guild chat, so I always shrugged it off.

Oh, about that age crack… I’m proud to say I’m 40 years old but I sure as hell don’t look my age, honey! You, on the other hand, may be several years younger but you could pass for an aging porn star who turned to drinking, food and drugs after she lost a starring role in the remake of Deep Throat. You compensate for your lack of real-life good looks by hiding behind the curves of your toons and doing that lame troll dance on top of the Dalaran inn dining table (I can tell you are such a f*cking pro!) or Orgrimmar bank, in an attempt to seduce the men and show to the whole world how bloody attractive you are.

When IRL, you look like this:

Karlia WoW

But I saw through your act, hun. And not only were you an insecure, man-hungry trollop but you were  also a power-tripping attention whore. Seriously, was it so necessary to send our GM text messages every single f*cking time someone offended you or didn’t follow guild rules? Our GM was already very stressed out at work and yet you had no qualms texting him your hissy-fits, hoping to come to your defense. How pathetic. You were a junior officer in the guild and yet you were acting like a f*cking brat who got her candy taken away from her.

Oh, I remember the time you got Clyde to fight me on your behalf because you thought I didn’t have the guts to tell you what I thought about your attitude. That’s right, hun, get all the men you think who’s in love with you to defend you. It’s that attitude of yours that got our GM so exasperated he yelled at you, me and Clyde on Vent. Me and the two white trash hooligans getting yelled at was about as exciting as finding out I won the lotto.

/sarcasm

And I remember that I left the guild. because I couldn’t stomach you and Clyde anymore.  And Denefblah followed suit. Then our GM talked to me in private and I told him point-blank that how I wished you and Clyde never joined our guild in the first place. You two ruined a beautiful guild..and how!

“Hiro, I don’t want to come back,” I said.

“If you don’t come back, I am going to disband Frozensoulstone,” he said quietly.

Well, that ain’t right. Disband a guild because two deranged f*cktards couldn’t get their act together? No way!

I returned.

And the three of us were forced to apologize to one another.

The issue died down and we were friends again.

Or so I thought.

To be continued…